Beevert

We walked to the park earlier today and on our way home, a little black wasp landed right on Lian's crotch.

Panic. Try not to panic.

I thought if I held the side of his shorts out and we kept walking it would fly away without getting crunched (and causing it to sting him in the manly bits). That jerk stayed with us for a whole block and Lian (who was carrying the biggest cicada ever, now named "Lazy" but who I think is really "Dead-y") was starting to freak out. So, I pulled his shorts away from his bod, and tried to get the wasp to move onto a leaf.

It.

Flew.

Up.

My.

Shirt.

F-word.

The only time I've ever been stung by a bee, I was stung by two at once when they flew up my shirt and I smacked at them like an idiot. So I made sure I was very calm, but it's a good thing I was wearing a sports bra. With the way our luck was going, it probably would have nestled in between mah gals. Perv. As it was, it crawled right back out ... and into my hair. Thankfully, we found a bush with little fruits that the wasp was happy enough to be wiped off onto.

I do not like batting at stinging insects, but I've found that most of them will allow you to transfer them to something else without copping a 'tude about it, particularly if it is flowery or fruity.

Along the way we ran across Nate and a group of his friends, all daring him to do something he didn't want to do. They turned around, saw us, and simultaneously crapped their pants. I believe their plans, whatever they happened to be, are foiled so whether I had a stinger next to the skin or not, I guess it was worth it in the end.

Well, and the trip to the park was fun. We ran into a girl I used to babysit. She has a baby now (and was chasing her around harassing her with apple slices). We talked about how nice our neighborhood is, and saw a lot of animals and insects. Didn't see any other big kids unfortunately but we'll have all winter to have parties at our house.

 

2 comments:

zamozo said...

Oh sh*t! ROFLMAO! I'm so glad you rescued both your boys and also glad you didn't have to remove your shirt to get the wasp transfered! Too funny!

Hilary said...

Ha! I know. I was contemplating it at one point, but I know my neighbors are way too uptight to witness something like that. lol